Stellar Women - Aimee Mullins

And 7 Big Ways To Turn Adversity Into Action

“Don’t think about the consequences of what everyone is going to think if you fall, just get to the end of the runway, turn around, and come back.”  - Aimee Mullins

That's her! Aimee Mullins, the gal with a smokin' hot brain and body who Full Spirited is getting lots of inspiration from this month. 

This 5'8" sometimes 6'1" (depending on her mood) beauty broke three world records at the paralympics, was the Brand Ambassador for L'Oreal Paris, and even modeled for the legendary Alexander McQueen. She wore the most amazing carved boots that can be seen in her TED Talk, My 12 Pairs Of Legs. 

Aimee Mullins was born without fibulae (calf bones) in both legs and on her first birthday doctors amputated both of her legs below the knee. At age two, this strong spirited gal learned to walk on prosthetic legs and throughout her childhood she participated in sports like soccer and softball. Then she became the first double amputee to compete in NCAA Division 1 track and field. She has since become a renowned inspirational speaker, model, actress, and advocate for prosthetics that function well and empower by representing the spirit of the wearer. 

Her Message: “Adversity isn’t an obstacle we need to get around in order to resume living our life, it’s part of our life...if you see adversity as natural, consistent, and useful we are less burdened by the presence of it.”

Pretty amazing message isn't it!

Aimee’s message represents the uncanny ability for the human spirit to succeed in any circumstance. It shows that we each have the ability to take a not so good thing in our lives and use it to propel us forward and create change that is truly amazing.

TWEET + ABLE = We simply have to choose the outcome we want.

Are you thinking...ok, but how do you actually use the not so awesome stuff to create really stellar stuff?

1. No more pity parties

Parties are awesome, but not the ones with pity at them. When we focus on the negative or what we perceive as a negative situation we don't leave any space for all of the positive, good opportunities to come into our lives. We can be so focused on the negative, that when opportunity does come into our life, we miss it completely. The good news is, you can choose to stay positive.

2. Focus on the positive

Choose to see at least one positive thing in each of your experiences. There will always be more than one, but sometimes it’s hard to see them, I totally get it! The awesome part is that  when you choose to see one positive outcome, it opens the door to two more positive outcomes and then a not so good has the potential to become a really really great!

3. See adversity as a way to learn

If you are having trouble finding the positive outcome, try this out: Take a step back from the situation and see it as if there is a bubble around it. Your whole experience is in a bubble and you are able to look in on it as a whole. How did you grow from this experience? Do you have more confidence? More insight? A greater understanding of yourself or others? What did this experience teach you? This is your positive outcome.

4. Use your experience to help others

Now it’s time to create some stellar stuff! Think about what you learned from your experience and how you can help other people with your new insight. Is there a way for you to teach others what you learned so that their experience is a little easier? Has your experience led you to innovative ideas that can help society as a whole? What did you learn from your unique experience that you can use to help other people?

5. Surround yourself with people who encourage you to say yes!

Yes I can do it!

Yes I am going to seize that opportunity.

Yes I am willing to try again.

We all need a solid support system and we especially NEED encouraging people around us when we are faced with adversity. No matter what situation we are in there will always be that voice (the ego) that tells us we can’t, and we need people who see the bigger picture of what is possible for us to say YES, you can.

6. Create a gratitude list

This is huge! We can get so caught up in our to-do list, our relationships, and the not so good stuff that we forget about all of the things we are thankful for. I encourage you to get a blank book and every night before you head to sleep write down ten things you are grateful for. Even if you don’t get the book and you just spend time thinking about what you are grateful for, this will create a huge shift in how you function and perceive the world. When we appreciate more of what we already have, we attract more of what we want.

7. Take action and keep going

Let’s get real! There will always be some form of adversity. I believe (as pesky as it is) it sticks around to keep us growing on an intellectual and soul level. And if we can accept this as the reason for adversity while keeping our bigger vision (goals, purpose) in the front of our mind and soul then we will naturally take more action. When you take more action, you grow and learn even more, you positively impact more people, and your unique message stretches further to those who need it most.

Click on comments below to share how you are creating opportunity from adversity.

I would love to hear from you.

I Don't Give A Fluting Fudgesicle

It’s true! I don’t! If I worried about what everyone thought about me or what they think I should be doing, it would be impossible for me to experience personal growth..and frankly, how the hell could I be happy that way!?

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I have to be totally honest though, it wasn’t always that way. I used to have so much anxiety about what other people thought. I wasn’t necessarily walking around thinking, does he like my pants, does my hair look silly. For me it was more about my actions. If I say this, is she going to get mad, or be offended, or even not like me? AGH! I was driving myself crazy.

That was until I realized just how trapped I was. And I was doing it to myself! By choosing my actions around my assumptions of what other people might think, I limited what I learned, where I went, what I did..and the list goes on.

You wouldn’t worry so much about what others think of you if you realized how seldom they do.
— Eleanor Roosevelt

Thanks Eleanor! So If you are feeling trapped because someone is doubting you or you are thinking way too much about what other people think...WHAT DO YOU DO?

1. Be YOU! The authentic you is the most powerful you.

Some gals won't like this photo or resonate with me, but that's great! It just means that we aren't a match and it isn't going to serve them or me to invest in a relationship together. 

TWEET + ABLE = "The authentic you is the most powerful you." @Ariel Frey

If you are looking to work with someone in any fashion, don’t you always connect best with the people who are genuine and trustworthy? So doesn’t it make sense that people would be attracted to you if you were that way?

Sometimes we get caught up in what we think they (client, boss, partner, friend) want. But people don’t want what we think they they want because they don’t know exactly what they want until they experience it. And on a soul level, because that’s what being authentic is, they are going to vibe (connect) with you more if you are being true to you.

And if you aren’t the right fit, that’s great news too! If you don’t have an authentic connection what that person it simply means that it wasn’t going to be a happy match anyway and there is someone else out there who is a perfect fit.

Taking responsibility for your beliefs and judgments gives you the power to change them.
— Byron Katie

2. Don't Wait For Someone Else To Give You Permission. 

Many of us feel like we need a degree, a certificate, or someone to pat us on the shoulder and say, "Ok! You are ready now!" But life just doesn't work like that. 

The secret is that you are the only one who can give you permission. You have to be confident that you are ready. Let's face it, you aren't going to know everything and be amazing the first time. No one is! 

Even if you do get a degree, there are plenty of things you won't learn until you get out into the field and start doing it. You have to choose to give yourself permission to get out there.

3. Take A Ton Of Action

Decide clearly what you really want to do.

Then surround yourself with people who support your plan and get rid of the people who don’t.

And finally, stay really positive about your goals and take lots of initiative and action.  

I'd love to hear from you!

Click on comments below and tell me how if you have ever felt stuck because of someone else doubts—and if so, what helped you break down the wall and start getting out there?

Lots of love,

Ariel